Reality shows: depending on your point of view, they're either a sign of the end of Western Civilization or the best thing EVAR!

But what if we combined reality shows with footballers, another source of endless entertainment?

We think you'll agree that it would be both hysterically funny strangely genius.

Seriously, where else do you get characters like Cristiano Ronaldo, Diego Maradona and Mario Balotelli?

Nowhere—that's where.

1. Diego Maradona

Model show: The Osbournes

Name of his show: D10S

Premise: None.

Cameras follow Maradona wherever he goes. Maradona does crazy stuff.

Wildly high ratings ensue.

I'd watch this show, by the way.

2. Cristiano Ronaldo

Model show: The Pickup Artist

Name of his show: Rich and Handsome

Premise: Mr. Rich and Handsome helps a bunch of lovable losers become bona fide European gigolos, complete with instructions on how to lure five hookers to an orgy in a Jacuzzi.

I would watch this show too.

3. David Beckham

Model show: Real Housewives series

Name of his show: Posh and Becks

Premise: Posh spends a bunch of money and gets facelifts while Becks is rarely seen, except while wearing underwear at the most inappropriate times imaginable.

4. Joey Barton

Model show: I'm A Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here!

Name of his show: I'm Joey Barton… And You're Not!

Premise: Joey Barton walks around insulting people. Everybody hates him.

Then he leaves the pitch.

5. Mario Balotelli

Model show: The Real World

Name of his show: Why Always Me?

Premise: Mario struggles to find his place in the real world along with a group of five house-mates.

The cameras decide the other cast members suck and only follow Mario around.

Hilarity ensues, as do great ratings.

I'd watch this one as well.

6. Clint Dempsey

Model show: The Contender

Name of his show: Deuces Wild

Premise: Dempsey, an aspiring rapper himself, launches the career of a hip-hop artist by whittling down a field of wannabes.

I’d definitely watch this.

7. Carlos Tevez

Model show: Big Brother

Name of his show: Keeping Up With Carlos

Premise: Tevez plays the game within the game, forging and breaking alliances with his teammates.

He wins by securing the best deal for himself.

8. Marouane Chamakh

Model show: Pros vs. Joes

Name of his show: Me Against The World

Premise: Marouane Chamakh gives fans the chance to live out a dream by playing them one-on-one in front of the cameras.

He almost always loses.

9. Wayne Rooney

Model show: Tommy Lee Goes To College

Name of his show: Wayne Walks To Work

Premise: Wayne Rooney gets a minimum-wage job and tries to fit in.

Gary Neville also stars as Rooney's co-worker. Just because.

10. John Terry

Model show: Blind Date

Name of his show: Win A Date With John Terry

Premise: John Terry dates his teammates’ wives and girlfriends.

Wait, what? That’s already happened?

Crap.